The CDC has been the authoritative source of information during the ongoing COVID-19 pandemic. In fact, many believe the agency to be the best source for up to date and accurate information on the coronavirus, but did you know America’s government is also ready to help you prepare for the zombie apocalypse?
That’s right. In 2011, the CDC launched its zombie apocalypse preparation and survival guide.
“Wonder why zombies, zombie apocalypse, and zombie preparedness continue to live or walk dead on a CDC web site? As it turns out what first began as a tongue-in-cheek campaign to engage new audiences with preparedness messages has proven to be a very effective platform, the CDC says. “We continue to reach and engage a wide variety of audiences on all hazards preparedness via zombie preparedness.”
“There are all kinds of emergencies out there that we can prepare for. Take a zombie apocalypse for example,” wrote Rear Admiral Dr. Ali S. han. “That’s right, I said z-o-m-b-i-e a-p-o-c-a-l-y-p-s-e. You may laugh now, but when it happens you’ll be happy you read this, and hey, maybe you’ll even learn a thing or two about how to prepare for a real emergency.”
So what do you need to do before zombies…or hurricanes or pandemics for example, actually happen? First of all, you should have an emergency kit in your house. This includes things like water, food, and other supplies to get you through the first couple of days before you can locate a zombie-free refugee camp (or in the event of a natural disaster, it will buy you some time until you are able to make your way to an evacuation shelter or utility lines are restored). Below are a few items you should include in your kit, for a full list visit the CDC Emergency page.
Here’s what the CDC recommends for a zombie apocalypse. I won’t discredit the agency, but we’re pretty sure the list is missing a shotgun, hatchet and of course, Twinkies.
- Water (1 gallon per person per day)
- Food (stock up on non-perishable items that you eat regularly)
- Medications (this includes prescription and non-prescription meds)
- Tools and Supplies (utility knife, duct tape, battery powered radio, etc.)
- Sanitation and Hygiene (household bleach, soap, towels, etc.)
- Clothing and Bedding (a change of clothes for each family member and blankets)
- Important documents (copies of your driver’s license, passport, and birth certificate to name a few)
- First Aid supplies (although you’re a goner if a zombie bites you, you can use these supplies to treat basic cuts and lacerations that you might get during a tornado or hurricane)
If there ever was a zombie apocalypse, guess what else the CDC has to offer…yep, isolation and quarantine…check. We’re good on that part.
“If zombies did start roaming the streets, CDC would conduct an investigation much like any other disease outbreak. CDC would provide technical assistance to cities, states, or international partners dealing with a zombie infestation. This assistance might include consultation, lab testing and analysis, patient management and care, tracking of contacts, and infection control (including isolation and quarantine). It’s likely that an investigation of this scenario would seek to accomplish several goals: determine the cause of the illness, the source of the infection/virus/toxin, learn how it is transmitted and how readily it is spread, how to break the cycle of transmission and thus prevent further cases, and how patients can best be treated,” the CDC says.